The Real Reasons Why Men Think You're Intimidating and How to Be Independent But Not Intimidating to Men
Are you an Alpha Female, who is tired of being told you’re too intimidating to men? Here the real reasons why men think you’re intimidating. You can be independent but not intimidating at the same time. This requires mastering your feminine and masculine energies and knowing how to balance the two. When you do, you’ll be able to have a successful relationship with an alpha man. Both of you together will be a power couple.
First, you must understand the real reasons why men think you’re intimidating.
They are beta males who lack direction and focus in their lives and your goals and achievements, not to mention, nice clothes, watch, car, financial independence and awesome credit score and home only magnifies their own inadequacies.
Understand that it is not your job to rescue men under the guise of “inspiring them,” or “helping” them be better than they were before you.
These beta males do not want responsibility. They actually want strong women so they get to slack off and remain in their comfort zones of basic careers (if they even have one) and complacency.
You’ll end up falling in love with their potential and then resenting them for not living up to the potential you see in them that they don’t see for themselves.
These men lack confidence and they see that you have it. They’ll praise you for it and you’ll find yourself being their career counselor, financial advisor, personal stylist, therapist and more!! Honey, you’ll be put in your masculine energy and you’ll feel drained.
And here’s the catch, many of these beta males are great, caring guys. They’re sweet, fun, kind, and attentive, but end up being boyfriends without ever progressing to the next level. Commitment isn’t their thing. They might be loyal, but there won’t be any forward momentum in life.
As a proud “Feminine Alpha Woman,” I understand what you long for. You want a leader, a man with a clear vision for his life and a plan to make it all happen, with you by his side. You want him to make the dinner reservations, ask for your thoughts on ideas and plans that he has for you both.
He leads you. You feel taken care of and secure with a man like this which allows you to be more true to your nature as a woman. You feel like you can work from a place of joy and fulfillment instead of scarcity. He’s got you in a way that makes you feel safe.
This allows you to show up for him as a feminine counterpart to his masculine. This is power-couple level stuff right here but there is a type of woman you must become in order to attract this King of a man.
If you have it all together in your life and want a true Alpha male or even a Sigma Male who is a less flashy, more reserved version of the Alpha, then you’ll have to get very clear about what it is you want in a partner.
Your LoveBlock is probably a doubt and disbelief that the man you truly want exists and if he does exist, he won’t be, for whatever reason, interested in you.
2. Another real reason men think you’re intimidating is because you lead with your masculine energy.
I used to have this issue. I was born and raised in New York. I had a tough girl exterior but inside I was super sensitive and very arrested in my development of self.
Most women who lead with their masculine energy do so out of fear and insecurity. It’s ok. Once I admitted this and started to investigate myself and discover what I was so afraid of (abandonment, not being loved), then I was able to understand why despite the career, the income, the vacations, the clothes, make-up, car etc… I felt like a bottomless glass that would never be filled up.
Here’s how to tell you lead with your masculine energy. You’re defensive. You have a feeling that you have to assert yourself with men. You talk, a lot. You judge, a lot (yourself and men). You also repel the alpha males who may think you are hot, gorgeous, and smart, but they never ask you out and if you manage to get one to ask you out, it never lasts. You wonder why.
Masculine energy.
If you find that you struggle to get the kind of man you truly want and find there’s a pattern that you’d like to finally break, click here to get your free LoveLife Assessment from me directly. I’m a Life Coach who specifically helps other Alpha Women to stand confidently in their Feminine Energy, so they become the kind of women Alpha / Sigma (high quality) men cross rooms to meet.
You want to be courted and shown effort consistently, then you’ll need to learn how to evoke this from a strong, mature man you can respect and admire.
Get the masculine energy under control and watch how the quality of the men you attract levels up.
3. You’re not playful! You’re uptight, too serious and aggressive.
Anyone serious will be intimidating and off-putting. A man wants to know he can make you laugh so laugh and play. Learn to flirt. I’m blown away at how many women have no clue how to flirt.
Let me offer an example of two women who see the same handsome man from across the bar at a very high end steakhouse. Both women are there with friends after work. Cassidy, the more masculine of the two, is dressed in a black form fitting V neck, matte jersey knit dress with sling back heels. Her hair is long and wavy, make-up is professional but a little more sexy due to the swipe of red lipstick she blotted onto her lips in the ladies room. She’s about 5’7” in shape, beautiful but she doesn’t really smile much. She’s an observer, sizing up the room. She’s 40, divorced 5 years and wants to be a mom. She froze her eggs when she was 32 and married because her then husband wasn’t ready for the financial commitment of fatherhood. Her eggs are still on ice and now, at 40, she deep down wants to be a mom. She goes to after work happy hours on a mission to find her man. She spots Joseph who is tall, built and dressed impeccably for his frame and stature. She wants to meet him and is considering either sending him a drink.
Sabrina, is the Feminine Alpha. Her work attire is a very chic, black tailored pantsuit with a vintage Rolling Stones T Shirt Underneath. She’s a marketing strategist so when she goes out after work she loses the crisp white button down shirt for something soft with some edge. She’s got long wavy hair that she pulls off her face showing off her green eyes, long eyelashes and warm smile. While chatting with colleagues she notices Joseph. She keeps looking in his direction thinking to herself how handsome he is and what he likes to do for fun. In a moment Joseph sees her looking at him. She holds her gaze, smiles at him, looks down, looks up again then turns to her work friend and says. “that guy over there is gorgeous.” Her work friend looks over, and says, Sabrina, he’s looking over here.
Sabrina looks at Joseph again and smiles. He raises his near empty glass to her and smiles back. She does the same back. At that moment the bartender asks Joseph what he’s drinking because the woman in the black dress, Cassidy, wants to get your next round.
Joseph is flattered but politely declines, tells the bartender to tell Cassidy he’s flattered but taken and asks the bartender to add Cassidy’s drink to his tab. He found Cassidy’s aggressive approach masculine and he was already drawn in to Sabrina’s playful feminine energy.
It’s ok to show interest just don’t be aggressive. Feminine women give alpha men permission to pursue. Women don’t pursue men. Women who pursue men attract beta men who want a strong woman so they can slack off.
If anything in this blog resonates with you and you want to handle whatever it is inside you that is running the show when it comes to dating and relationships then click here for your free LoveLife Assessment by Certified Professional Life Coach and Dating & Relationship Expert, Lisa Concepcion.